I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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