Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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