Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
