im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize