I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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