Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
