Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Randomize
