Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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