Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
YAS. BRING CRAB.
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