is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
