As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
