North Korea, Best Korea!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
