i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
