We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Umm I'm too high to move.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
