my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
