So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
