Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
is this the sara with the beer cane?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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