I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
