omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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