Fine. I'll sleep in my office
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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