I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
