Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
