I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Randomize
