he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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