How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Randomize