do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
