You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
