so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
