The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Randomize
