Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize