As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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