You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
