and she was petting her beer can
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
