Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
