Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
is that a dick in a sweater?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize