The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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