I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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