Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
