the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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