Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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