why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
