Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
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