Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
