At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
