$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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