chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Someone shattered a urinal.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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