Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
