I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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