shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
