i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
